It started with a feeling, not in the ear, but in the gut. Music had always been an intensely corporeal experience for me. When I listened, and especially when I played, the sound only seemed to start in my ears before making my whole body vibrate in sympathy. It felt as though there were reverberant cords at the center of my being—like the strings some scientists think constitute the basis of existence itself—and experiencing music, more than any other activity, brought these cords into resounding life. In the moment of performance, as the poet said, I was the music, with every atom of my being seeming to sync up to its frequencies.
What Remains Behind
After hearing loss, facing a changed relationship with the music that felt like everything
